Death calls her!

She was everything mom ever had

and she became the only thing she had

Now that she is gone

Who will my mom bank upon

She was sweet soft and gentle

like all the other grannies

she was patient, kind and subtle 

without enough pennies

She was all normal 

until death came her way

Her soul left her in peace

while she was asleep

oh how blessed was she

To die in peace

without troubling people

she reached lord's feet.

She was old and weak

yet humane and nice

she was poor and meek

yet generous and wise

weep not for the dead

read a discourse note 

that does hinder the soul

from entering the heaven at all !

Tears didn't touch the ground

As I didn't want to mourn

All I do is pray

oh depart in peace,you soul!

Miss you granny

as much mom does

Give her strength 

to bear the pain.

sleep in peace

granny

sleep in peace

Oh yeah ! 

Grannies are special

as told by a pal

she would always stay

in everyone's heart , I pray

Apathy.

I have become a dormant writer lately and certainly there float some regrets.when I look back into the past, I could see how earnest I was, in general . Let alone writing, I would have that urge in me to keep posting something onto my blog page. But, I have become so passive as an individual in the things that I have always loved to do. There had been a transformation I would say, that I have gone through which according to me is real bad.I sometimes feel that I have never been like this before. I'm totally uninterested in the things that I was keenly associated with. I was sentimental, sympathetic and kind and now, I think I'm devoid of all these qualities that were my possessions earlier.Perhaps,it is good in a way to be non sentimental and unemotional.The devotion and sincerity which were aiding me in the past, have gone missing. When I introspect more, I could see that I have become worse at almost everything I was good at. Blame it on the environment, I'm put up in. I don't live there anymore.There is so much of content in everything now. I have started settling for pennies, when I ought to earn millions in all aspects.It's high time, I got to change.Getting back the old me, is tough I know. But I should somehow change ASAP.

P.S: Written with frustration and egoism.

I have been aiming to pen down a happy post, but somehow, it's never happening. Perhaps,I will write something gleeful next time.

An Uncouth incident

It's been a while since i penned down something on this page. But. today I thought I could write something that is  neither serious nor a funny incident. A friend and I went to take his cycle back from the repair shop.The cycle needed puncture fix and seat change. The workmen there had already fixed the punctured tyres and changed the seat in front of us. That hardly took five minutes. That came with a seat cover too. When we asked about the amount we ought to pay for the repairs, my friend got a little shocked. As they told, the seat costs 200 bucks and the cover is for 30 bucks and the puncture repairs add upto 20 bucks making a total of 250 bucks.When we questioned him about the hefty amount he is charging for the seat, he started on with his vernacular remarks aimed at us thinking that my friend wouldn't understand. Poor fellas didn't know that my friend knows a little tamil. One man among the three stood up and told that he should have charged more with the replacement of the valves but somehow he managed to repair the existing one. The other two were supporting him . Another friend was also waiting with us and the man diverted his attention to him thinking that he was another customer.When he came to know that the guy had also come with us, he made a remark " oru cycleku moonu peru kaaval huh!?!"(trans: three people waiting to get a cycle repaired?). That was quite sarcastic.My friend paid the money unwillingly and we were about to leave the place. The lock wasn't proper and we tried to open it. Another man among the barabaric specimens(referring to the workmen) said "anna lockum seri panni kuduthudinga".(Translation: bro repair the lock also) The rude one among the three replied " idhukey ivlo yosikraanga. innum lock ellam seri panni kudutha, avanuku nenju valiye vandhudum"(Trans: For this itself he is thinking soo much, if I repair the lock and add onto the bill he will get a heart attack!) How uncouth the people here are!! Making fun of someone who just asked about the individual split up of the rates and that too in a language that he doesn't know. Shame on them to behave in an uncivilized way.

The Break Up

Well, It's been ages since i posted something on this blogspot. 

A short prelude about this post.. Everyone would have fallen in love at some point of time in his/her life.. Let's get on to see how a guy laments after he breaks up with his girl .. :P

There was a time, when I had someone who always thought about me.. someone who cared for me like anything. someone who stood by me through all my hardships. Someone whom i loved to be with all the time..

But, that didn't last for long. She was affable, seraphic,graceful and a perfect 'Apsaras'. She was everything for me then. I was clueless on what went wrong. She started keeping off from me. This made me think that someone else has made his foray into her life. When asked about that, She was keeping mum. One fine day, She said that she was in a relationship with the other guy. Gosh! how hard her heart is?. How could she do that to me. How easy it was for her to get in and get out piercing my heart twice.well, Girls are used to doing things similar to this. 

And how could she say that she can't leave both of us?!? Perhaps, she would have thought that i would accept that.. Well, No.how can anyone who was head over heels in love with someone accept that?And we broke up..It was I who called it off. Nevertheless, She was interested in me. She has caused an unbearable pain in my heart. We guys are really magnanimous to forgive such girls despite the fact that they are real bitches. 

People say 'Time heals'.. I don't agree to it completely. As one gets busy,doing something of his interest, there wouldn't be any time to think of the past. There would be no room for 'Nostalgia' in One's life then.

Worth a Wait

Waiting for your eyes

to fall upon me

to look into my eyes and

interpret my mind

you will get to

know my grief

waiting to hear the words from your mouth

that would soothe my soul

that would turn me into a new man

that would clean up my mind from the broodings of

the past

waiting for your hands

to touch me

to take away my rues

and to melt me down into tears

A touch that would tidy up

my sinful heart

that would turn me into a saint

Listen my girl

you are worth the wait

hope it would change my fate!

We were asked to give feedback on our college life.The first word that came to my mind was "yuck"!

you would wonder why I'm so dejected to answer like that. Our college life was disgusting. Believe me! There are people whom we call as "friends" - whom we bank on all the time -whom we trust more than anyone. But we dont realise that they are those who get their things done by us - who come to us only when they need anything. Deceitful and cunning people!

This doesn't mean that i don't have any friends.I too have a few good friends.There are few creatures who pretend to be friends with everyone in a group say for instance a class.Their intention is to "socialize" and nothing else. They feign to be good to all and that seems so artificial. Pure ostentation! I despise this attitude very much..

What's the reason behind my moan? I should be specific at this point.It's someone who was my best pal during college days and now we're not even in touch. There were ample changes in "X" whose acts were unreal all of a sudden. X started behaving oddly, trying to socialize with almost everyone in the class.It seemed extremely weird for me.

The saddest thing i have ever done is that i wrote a poem for this X in the same old blog page.Ofcourse it's a matter of regret now!I hate this creature now. I have even decided not to

consider this X as a human being anymore..Now, you would understand why i used the word "creature" for reference while starting off.

Solitude

hey tree?

how can you

  stand on your own

   sans anyone!

    how lucky are you!

     to be alone 

    isolated from so called

      "the others"

   you might have had

   quite a few birds as

    your pals but do they still

         remain in your so called "mateship"?

 

    when you were rich

         with green leaves and fruits

             they all were banking upon you.

            But now, do you have anyone

        to care for you now?

      I guess NO!

          have you ever thought

           that they all would fly away

               leaving you alone one day?

            But,that's what happens!

        Never trust anyone

         people feign as friends

          they will care and they 

            won't be there when you 

          need them.

               never get attached to

                anyone.It wont last for certain

         live on your own

        Be independent

           and confident

            Being alone is 

            really a gift to

                do things on our own

                we can spend ample time 

                on things that we are 

                 interested in without 

                  the tamper of others.

                Introspection can be

                 made giving time to think

                  about our self offering

                  strength and determination

                      and 

                a better personality

                                                                         before cremation!                                                         

                                                            

Doleful Moments

well why do we listen to songs those evoke pain in our heart while we are depressed?

It's quite natural. It's like recalling the past and trowing what went wrong.

Break ups are quite common nowadays. They dont pertain only for  lovers.even, close friends can break apart.But, both hold the same kind of aftermaths.Human beings are blessed with a special power of getting over such heart breaking things with time. But, I still wonder whether i can ameliorate after sometime.

It keeps haunting me.Im feeling nostalgic and sad,grieving about the past.Im hurt.I don't think i can ever get whole bunch of care and affection from anyone anymore.It's like something has been taken from deep inside of me leaving me alone and desolate.I should not have got closer to a friend that i started expecting things which led me to face a sequel of dashing hopes.I couldn't stop thinking about the past. Atleast cherishing those wonderful memories can help me get better.I can't forget anything and those memories keep obsessing, making me sink in despair.

I used to download helluva sad songs hoping that they would help me sometime.And now it's the time to listen to such tracks.I normally dont focus on the lyrics much while listening to songs.Instead, used to concentrate deeply on the beats and the background.But, now im choosing songs with good lyrics to listen.And now it's the phase of rueful songs which have drawn my interest.Im listening to some selected songs again and again more than ten times a day.

very meaningful lyrics in a song makes me listen to it again and again!

"Flames to dust

  why do all good things 

 come to an end?"

I still wonder why do all  good things  end? I felt glad when i got something precious and now it has ended taking back my smile and glee. The most painful thing to do is to bid adieu to someone very close, someone you care for, someone like your sibling.Why did it happen to me?I didnt have strength in my  soul to say goodbye. The most distressing and hardest thing is to say goodbye to loved ones.Why i ve been put in sucha situation? well, its very tough for me not to think about the old memories which made me happy.I'm trying hard to forget everything, but i couldn't.Trying to keep myself occupied with something im interested in. Despite that, i couldn't stop thinking of the past.Even, tears are taking revenge on me.

This shouldn't happen to anyone.I started listening to "goodbye" songs and they make me feel better.hope, i ll get over it soon.

DOLOR

I was on seventh heaven

when you made an entry

into my life

It all started with a song

thanks to Madge 

who played a part in

bringing us near

I still cherish those

wonderful moments

We shared together

can't forget anything

I was really glad

after a very long time

It was you who brought 

smile on my face

but it all lasted for

quite a few days

 I wondered how you

disproved my jinx

I thought how lucky i am

to get you

but, everything vanished

in a jiffy

It always happens to me

whenever i get close

to someone

it never lasts long

Im always left behind

alone and abandoned

is this a boon for me 

given by the almighty?

It's the most painful thing

one can ever talk about

It's the most pathetic thing 

one can ever do

It's the most distressing thing

one can ever experience

How easy it was

for you to say 

that disheartening word

"goodbye"

It looks simple but has

a very complex meaning 

in it

My words seemed artificial

for you and 

you always suspected me

and acted quite rude

you hurt me ultimately

despite these

my love for you

has not dwindled even

a bit.

I never thought

you can be like this!

I never thought 

you will leave me alone

pushing me into the

world of grief, distress and despair

Thanks for being with me

sticking by me , guiding me

through the right path

i will never forget you

you will accomplish 

whatever you tend to

my prayers and good wishes

will always remain with you

forever and ever

None can ever get close to me

None can replace you

in my heart

None can take me back

from the domain of depression

All i want to say is

I miss you terribly

take care and be safe

stay happy with a

smile on your face!

Long distance relationship - unimaginable!

I never meant to hurt you

just spoke my heart open

was that wrong or

was that right?

was that too worse to hurt you?

am i cynic or is it you?

is being open too much for you?

i never knew!

did i spite you?

im sorry for being blunt

and forthright.

but when u think deep

you will find it right

whatever i said and

whatever i did

when i was down

you were there with me

but does it mean that

you are my world?

you are my dearest friend

and always will be

but nothing more

and no second thought

all that matters is

"distance"

and indeed we never met!

i dont believe in 

long distance relationship

and thats the reason

for me keeping off from you

you will have a great life

if you find someone there

im sure you will get a 

guy better than me in all ways

may your life flourish

and your mind cherish

let all your dreams come true 

with my prayers and hugs!

Despair

i go hapless

  when im wingless

that makes me ruthless

 and eventually lifeless

set-up!

doesnt make any sense

in my case

upset

ooh!its the trace

that makes me chase

things coiled in a foil

brings tension and turmoil

hope shattered and spoilt

makes my blood boil

when i rise

up in the dawn

i surmise

my stress has gone

but it vanishes

in a jiffy

leaving my eyes

puffy

waking up to face

tonnes of issues at a pace

lacking in grace

alas! none to embrace

                       

still finding my path

in excessive wrath

sunken in despair

drunken to retire

lost in zephyr

my heart seeks repair

healing power

will i get it ever?

Distress :-(

I cry

devoid of a reason

I sigh

all over the season

things change

over a period

minds same

remaining fagged

My woes

pricking in a fashion

din change

resting in a cushion

Love hurts

lacking in passion

life sucks

living in suspicion!

you made 

me to go bonker

i might

switch to a nagger

This sounds

saddest to the core and

I miss

people next my door and,

I feel

lonesome and boring

can't sleep

even with snoring!

Im alone

always on this earth 

None cares

for me in this world!

Not gonna

give a damn for anything!

not gonna 

mind a gram about anything!

Hurray its 2009!!

                                          Hey babe...

                                                  

                                                 shake your body 

                                                 Tap your feet

                                                  rock n roll

                                                 A year has born!

                                        

                                                 Its a year starting afresh

                                                 forget all your woes at a stretch

                                                 forgive all the people of wretch

                                                 and stop acting like a bitch!

                                                Never hurt Never hurt

                                                Never hurt a guy anymore

                                                wont stand he wont stand

                                                He wont stand to the core!

                                               We all look for "transformation"

                                               but u look for "Acquisition"

                                               Be realistic and materialistic

                                               and not voyueristic and dramatic!

                                               Let me peer

                                               whether you change this year

                                               dont be a liar

                                               will love you dear

                                              I still believe that

                                              you will repent 

                                              for all what you did

                                              and come to me kid!

                                              hoping for the best

                                              praying for the rest

                                              God keep you safe

                                             till we go on a date!

                                                      ;-)

                                                                                        

                                              

                                      

                                    

A Paradigm of depression!

i could have been dumb
and kept mum!
but was hasty and swollen
and became a bum!

whats the use in remorsing
whats the need of compuncting
and why am i contriting !
well, god will be heeding!

i was sucha crap to do that
i went buggy and balmy
and did a thing
which was poopy and crappy
and regretting like a filthy!

jabbed myself into the world of distress!
and feeling for it after ingress
that's quite sad
and Im feeling so bad

i never listened to you at times
and have disappointed you ample times
but, u are suchan angel
to forgive me those times!

bothering your words
Im having second thoughts
and apologised sincerely
and will never do that even rarely!

will stay aplomb
here after
and will try to be diplomatic
here after!

And i ll be unique
in my own ways
will resume being
in the forth coming days!

"self respect" is quite important
in a "profession"
or even in personal life
and i understood that very late
and ll try to change my fate!

WELL INDITED WORK!

This is a poem written for me by my best friend!
:))


How can one smile such sweet smiles,
When one is so saddened by sorrows for miles,
How can I smile the same smiles,
When life brings me nothing but tears,

I wondered for so long,
What reason you had to smile that long,
To keep smiling though troubles come,
And still remain sweet and silently overcome,

It's such a mystery to me,
Your smiles from heaven with glee,
I adore and yet envy thee,
But I'd rather you smile those at me,

I feel happy when I see you smile,
Even if I'm sad and lonely,
Your smiles bring me somewhere,
I don't even know where,

But it was you,
You gave me the reason to smile,
To smile with no reason,
To smile for a smile,

I guess life is just like that,
We need not a reason to smile,
For a smile is the reason itself,
To rejoice and open-heartedly give thanks,

I learned to smile because of you,
Because your smiles bring me joy when blue,
It proves how well and powerful,
A simple sweet smile can become so beautiful,

Smile for the sake of a smile,
Smile for the sake of happiness,
Smile for the sake of life,
Smile because of hope left in life,

Smile my friends,
Smile for me my Love,
Smile those same sweet smiles,
Smile so the world can be a peaceful dove... ;-)

PAYING TRIBUTE TO MS.BALI

well to start with, MS.BALI , the evergreen legend of bollywood till date, she is the most alluring and beautiful actress ever. she is the killer to so many people like me even today! she made her debut in "vazhkai" by AVM productions at the age of 15 in 1950. she got a break in hindi movies with "ladki" and "nagin" in 1954.
some of her renowned works include

madhumati
ganga jamuna
leader
naya daur
The first two of those four roles earned her filmfare best actress award.
also,
sangam
amra pali,(the buddhist courtesan)
jewel thief
new delhi
were some of her great memorable films!
ms.Bali was married to DR.chamanlal bali who was the family physician for actor raj kapoor..and she was a former MP too. :)
and one crucial thing to mention over here s tat she is a great great classical dancer.she is exceptionally skilled in classical dancing. A dextrous dancer!.and she s the most favourite dancer of madhuri dixit!..:)
she s still performing for some shows in music academy during new year's eve every year.m craving to see her dance atleast once in my life time.
long live ms.bali. already she is 72!
he he...:))

renold on seventh heaven!

It was a fun filled day!

in a special way :)

jollied along in untrodden ways
and was great among my past birthdays!

quite different
from all other days!
guess its cool
in its own way!

hurray aww alas !!
my outcry goes like this
amorous great quixotic
my heart pounds like this!

 hope, it goes on
well like this
:)
and within my next b'day
let me find my fille
caring and loving with
a benevolent heart like a bliss!

:))

MISSING SOME ONE!

grief grief grief
endless woe
all happened when
you left me alone!
:((


i kept planning things
i made certain things
like how our future would be
and how my partner could be!


but, everything passed away
like a dream !
and nothing happened as
i thought could be
:(

when we had a huge fight
i thought it would end like
the usual one and i never thought
it would land us like this

you never accepted
my apology!
and ditched me
mercilessly


i for gave you as days passed by
but, my memories still flood back
to the days when we stayed together
enjoying ourselves in the rain
and crying eyes in pain!

miss you miss you
still missing you
will miss you
always

:(

undefinable pain in my heart
caused by you
that would never heal for ever
and you ll always remain
in my memories for ever!

A thing to remember!

After a long time
my fren called me!
we were so close before
but lost touch abruptly
and it was so nice
to hear from him again!

im on cloud nine:)
im on seventh heaven!
its a bliss
oops i do miss
:(

close to my heart
ma friend is!
close to my soul
ma friend is!

am happy as ever and
sweet as never!
m full of high spirits
m full of high spirits!

gonna meet ma fren one day
its gonna b fun day
ma heart and mind are full of joy
and wish tat it lasts for ever and ever!

HARD CORE EFFUSIVE FILM!

well, i thought of sharing my views abt a film that i watched very recently.. rather, i can describe this post as "review" of the movie... the movie s"baabul" which was released in the year 2006.. it was one of d movies which affected me emotionally. the film s entirely about "widow remarriage"..it was picturised in a very nice way..and i have to mention here tat m a die hard fan of "ms.mukherjee".. her role was jus fantastic..she has played her part well.. pitiful thing s the inauspicious death of salman khan( rani's hubby)..it was so sad.. john abraham s part was very decent. his role was quite gud.. and above all, amitabh's dialogues were just touching..making our hearts melt! hema malini, a very affectionate mom..her looks were like, she was still young...as she appeared in "chachha bathija" and other films of that 70's.. sarika(kamal's wife) was given a guest role.. eventually, the film was gr8..its a gud feast for persons excessively affected by emotions! good film!